Often times getting the nerve to file the complaint for divorce can take months.  After being served with the divorce complaint and find an attorney to represent you and file an answer or counterclaim on your behalf can take another couple of months.  Then the bickering really starts as the parties understand that the process is real and soon they will no longer be married to each other.

Time heals old wounds the addage goes and can be the gateway for divorcing couples to move beyond the initial anger and bitterness and transition to acceptance that life as they know it, is over.  A new chapter beings for everyone involved, especially the children.  Embracing a solution that is created by the two people who created their children is much easier to swallow than a stranger in a black robe dictating your family and childrens’ needs.

So, how can you reach a settlement to avoid a costly and timely trial?  Here’s some ideas:

  1.  Dispense with the anger and bitterness.
  2. Don’t have unreasonable expectations.
  3. Listen to your attorneys and ask every question you can think of.
  4. Understand that your children love and need the both of you.
  5. Don’t let family and friends undermine your compromises.  A true settlement is a series of compromises.
  6. Fight the important battles, not the minutia.

Speak with a seasoned matrimonial attorney at 732-852-7550 to help you realize your goals and needs to put your divorce or post judgment issues behind you.


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